Thursday, October 22, 2020

Week 9 Story: The Troubles of Mr. Fox

*An updated version of this story can be found in my portfolio, which is located here!*


The bell above the door rang in an obnoxiously joyful manner as Mr. Fox shuffled into the dimly-lit and smoky bar. After surveying the room for a second, he decided to take his place at the stool directly across from the old bartender, Mr. Badger. 

"What can I do ya for," old man Badger asked in a deep and raspy voice. "The cheapest whiskey you got back there. On the rocks," Mr. Fox replied. As he watched the dark liquid fill the glass he sighed deeply.

"You wanna know something?" Mr. Badger gave Mr. Fox a look to indicate that no, not now and not ever, did he want to hear the grievances that were destined to spill over the three feet of oak that separated him from his customers. Unfortunately, Mr. Fox did not notice the look, nor did he seem to care for the real answer. 

"It's that damned brer Rabbit! For the life of me, I cannot seem to win anything when it comes to him!" Mr. Badger decided to go the route of ignoring the words coming from the mangy fox, but he figured it would do him no good, seeing as how the fox was currently his only customer. 

"All I want to do is to beat him at his silly little games, but somehow he always wins. I even tried eating him, for cryin' out loud!" Mr. Badger slowly lifted his gaze from the glass he was somehow always drying. If Mr. Fox wasn't going to shut up about the rabbit he might as well engage in the conversation. Hell, it was the only thing to do around here. He set down the glass and, with a deep breath, asked Mr. Fox, "What all seems to be the problem?"

After good long drink of his borderline unbearably cheap whiskey (whatever gets the job done, right?), the fox started in again. "Well there was the time when I tried to trick him with a little tar-baby. Oh yes the tar-baby. It was this fake little sticky trap, you see. All I wanted was to make him hurt by stickin him to the tar and killin' the bastard. Somehow he got loose and was tauntin' me from up over yonder on the hill." 

"Was he now?"

"He was! Kept sayin' all this stuff about how I could kill him any way I like but that I shouldn't throw him in the briar patch. Of course, I threw him in the patch and BOOM he was up on the hill!" One for theatrics, Mr. Fox banged his dirty paws on the bar to emphasize the boom. One decidedly not for theatrics, Mr. Badger simply gave him a look of disgust and turned back to his cleaning. 

"So of course I went home and devised a plan to hurt him some other way. The only thing I could think of was to go after his youngins. They would be extra tasty, after all."

"Of course. The logical next step," the weary badger replied. 

"I had to watch the old hopper for a while, but once I knew when he and the wife would be out of the house, I hatched a plan. Now, I couldn't just waltz up in there and snatch them up with no reason. No, I had to be mad!"

"Sure sure. Go on."

"So I sneaked up in there and sat down like I owned the place. Ha! It felt good to finally get my revenge. I had those little bunnies hoppin' all up and down this side of the Mississippi," Mr. Fox said as he swallowed the last of the drink. Now he was feeling good.



Mr. Fox and the little rabbits he tried to eat

"I gave them the most impossible tasks, you see. Told them to break me off a piece of real strong sugar cane. They couldn't do it until the little bird told them how. Oh the freakin' bird! He was givin' them all these damn hints and foilin' my plan! Anyway, I told them to fetch me water with a sifter. A sifter! They wouldn't've been able to do that either if it weren't for the bird! Finally told them to fetch me a giant log for the fire. Took them a minute but by golly the bird helped again."

"Ah. Always a bird," Mr. Badger replied, shaking his head.

"Well, just about the time they got the log on the fire guess who saunters in. Brer Rabbit! Seeing as how I wouldn't be able to get the babies with me, I just decided to go home." Mr. Fox motioned for a refill on his drink. Mr. Badger obliged, thinking it might shut him up.

"Sounds like you've had a rough go of it. I hope things turn around for you soon, but this is last call. You better finish up that drink and go on home," the badger said. Mr. Fox took the whole thing in one go, tipped his hat, and left. 

"I'll get him next time."


Author's Note:

Thanks for reading! As you can see, I changed up the original stories quite a bit, and added a character, the bartender. I felt like this was the perfect opportunity to explore a story almost solely based on dialogue, as well as to re-invent the tale into something more modern. I wanted Mr. Fox to summarize his troubles, rather than telling them verbatim. I think this makes more sense and would mimic the flow of actual conversation with a stranger. I had a lot of fun writing this and I hope you have fun reading it!

Bibliography:
Uncle Remus: His Songs and His Sayings by Joel Chandler Harris (1881)

Reading Notes: Brer Rabbit, Part B

Mr. Rabbit Meets His Match Again

Summary:

Mr. Buzzard and Mr. Rabbit were working together to make a profit from the crops, but this year the crops were no good for Mr. Buzzard. Mr. Rabbit also pretended his were no good until Mr. Buzzard decided to lie and tell Mr. Rabbit that he had gold mine across the river. Mr. Rabbit climbed on his back and they started flying across the river. Mr. Buzzard knew Rabbit was lying about his crops, so he took him to the highest tree in the middle of the lake and perched there until Rabbit confessed. Mr. Buzzard acted like he was going to make Mr. Rabbit fall off, thus was his revenge for the lying. 

  • I enjoyed that the story felt different than the other ones in the series. There was not as much dialogue (which can be good or bad) but more narration. 
  • I liked the idea that Mr. Rabbit didn't always win against the other animals in the world, but that he sometimes got what was coming to him. 
  • I think I can use the idea of a main character who is like Mr. Rabbit in my future stories. He usually wins, but when he doesn't it is sweet satisfaction.


Mr. Rabbit and Mr. Buzzard Contemplating their Losses

A Story about Little Rabbits

Summary:

One day both Mr. and Mrs. Rabbit were out and only the little rabbits were left at home. Brer Fox took this opportunity to drop in and try to find an excuse to eat the children. First he tried to get them to break a piece of sugar cane for him, then he asked them to gather water for him with a sifter, then he asked them to carry a giant piece of log that was too heavy. During all their tasks, a little bird was helping them complete them so brer fox didn't get mad. They completed the tasks just in time for Mr. Rabbit to come home and cause brer fox to leave. 

  • There is not a ton of dialogue in this story
  • I like the idea of having the small stanzas of almost-poems in my future stories
    • "Sifter hold water same as a tray,
      If you fill it with moss and dob it with clay;
      The Fox get madder the longer you stay—
      Fill it with moss and dob it with clay."
  • The way the fox loses once again is what connects the stories, and I would like to try to do something like that for mine

Bibliography:
Uncle Remus: His Songs and His Sayings, Joel Chandler Harris (1881)

Tuesday, October 20, 2020

Reading Notes: Brer Rabbit, Part A

The Wonderful Tar-Baby

Summary: Brer fox was chasing brer rabbit (presumably to eventually eat him) but he got away the first time. In this story, brer fox laid a trap for brer rabbit by putting a tar-baby in the road on his path. Brer rabbit struck up conversation with the baby, ended up sticking himself to the the tar, and brer fox won this round because the rabbit was stuck. 

  • Enjoyed the subtle repetitiveness of several lines
    • "Brer fox, he lay low"
    • "The Tar-Baby, she ain't saying nothing."
  • The dialogue was entertaining and prompted the story forward
  • The building tensions between Brer fox and Brer rabbit are something I would like to try to mimic in my own story-telling



 
Brer Fox taunting Brer Rabbit while he is stuck to the Tar-Baby. 



How Mr. Rabbit was Too Sharp for Mr. Fox

Summary: Brer fox, after the previous story had ended up with brer rabbit sticking himself to the tar-baby, approaches him and lists out all the was he could potentially kill him to eat him. He lists things like hanging, skinning him, or drowning him. After each option, brer rabbit tell brer fox that he could do anything he wanted except throw him in the briar patch. Of course, this idea eventually prompted brer fox to do just that, and when he threw brer rabbit he saw that he was outsmarted and brer rabbit escaped yet again. 
  • Again, the repeating lines were a nice touch
    • "but don't fling me in that brier-patch"
    • "but do for the Lord's sake don't fling me in that brier-patch"
  • The author always does a good job with dialogue and narration
  • The defeat of brer fox over and over again is a good idea for a villain's story if I write one. 

Overall, I would like to mimic the episodic nature of the story. I need to get better at dialogue between characters that feels natural, so I think I could refer back to this to do so. I also enjoyed that there was a clear dialect that wasn't confusing for readers, but worked to create a picture of who the characters were and what they would be like. 

Bibliography: Uncle Remus: His Songs and His Sayings, by Joel Chandler Harris (1881).



Thursday, October 15, 2020

Week 8 Comments and Feedback



I chose this image because, as you will read in this post, I think a critical part of the feedback process is receiving criticism on your work. Criticism inspires you to be a better writer and to learn from your mistakes. 


Feedback in

    Overall, the feedback from my classmates is very good. I would rate it an eight out of ten on the "quality" scale. I'll be honest, sometimes I find myself getting a little offended by the comments because in my mind what I wrote made perfect sense. However, I know that I never write something that is perfect and doesn't need to be corrected or edited in some way. Even though the comments telling me to edit something hurt the most, they are the most helpful because they push me to be a better writer. They help me understand how to write from someone else's point of view and allow me to grow. I find that the comments in life (either on the blogposts for class or in life from your loved ones) that make you go "hey, I don't do that! What are you talking about," are the ones that are the truest.

Feedback out

    I think I would rate the quality of my own feedback for other people at a six-ish. I think I struggle with giving good feedback because I never want to make someone feel bad or hurt their feelings in any way. I will say that I do a good job at pointing out the things people do right, but like I said in the previous section, the comments that point out things you can do better are the most helpful.

Blog comments

    In general, I think the blogposts are a really good way to get to know someone and connect with them a bit. The blogs show people's writing styles, the things they are interested in, and the way they learn about mythology. I am happy with my introduction post. After re-reading it, I think I did a pretty decent job at giving a real introduction to who I am and what I am interested in. I also think that people could get a sense of who I am from the way I spoke and the things that I included in the post, like the enneagram test and the movie clip. 

Looking forward

    I think the main thing I want to do differently to make the feedback more useful for others would be to focus on gently and kindly pointing out things that could be done differently. I like reading and writing, so I think the next steps for me would be to implement what I love about my favorite works and help implement those into my comments for other people, using good examples as comparison. I don't know that I need to make any changes to my introduction, as I got pretty good feedback on that.


Microfiction Revisions: Two Spooky Little Stories

Original Texts: Got Ya I ran. I ran as fast as I possibly could, the branches whipping at face, grabbing at my hair. It was almost as though...